1 Identify the most difficult games to come and bribe the umpires.
2 Sign up a deal with Prada to provide the "handbags" that we apparently get involved with a lot and sell of each of the twenty paces where the handbags are used to blue chip multinationals. This should bring in enough to pay off the umpires.
3 I don't like yellow. Why can we not appeal to the authorities and get some snazzy silver cards for our guys?
4 Our netminder seems to be the business. Can we sell him to that crook at Chelsea?
I can't tell you how excited I am at this football business. I will be able to write of £100,000,000 of tax liabilities and use some of it to bring caviar and iced vodka to the terraces and samovars to the dressing rooms.
Another thing before cocktail hour strikes. My full name is Abram Romanovic Romanovic. If you translate my family name into English it means......Neville Neville.
How about that my Lanky friends?!